I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize