I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
you made out with another girl for some wings
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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