Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
