I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
operation harelip BJ is a go
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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