I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
well you can't waste a boner
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.