i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize