Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
