The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize