How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
