Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
You ruined the universe
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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