ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize