i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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