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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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