He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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