I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
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i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
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I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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