Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're like a gay fantastic four
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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