Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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