I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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