do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
