You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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