if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
