wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
there was a trapeze. enough said
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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