Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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