Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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