There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
