So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I just gargled with NyQuil
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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