flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
