That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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