I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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