It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
