Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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