Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
