I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
