You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
