I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
