So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize