Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
