so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
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