My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
