I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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