Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
