He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize