Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
