So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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