Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
