You really coming over, don't trick.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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