Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Dicks are not precious.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
