My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
This is the high leading the old right now
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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