Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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