I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.