Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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