I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US